“Feminist” is not a pejorative
I love boobs and sex and loathe the chaste philosophy of Stephanie Meyer’s narratives, but my sometimes piggish objectification of women as sexual objects doesn’t change the fact that if you can’t understand why a feminist perspective is important to every man, than you’re either woefully self-centered, or you’re a covert misogynist (I’ve been called, perhaps rightfully, a “passive misogynist” before).
All the #ShutUpSlut comments are shrouded under the guise of “I just want to make dudes laugh,” but they’re not helpful or even funny (most of the time). A feminist simply seeks to “advocate social, political, legal, and economic rights for women equal to those of men,” so how is that a bad thing?
Jokes about feminism are fine, but every time someone neglects a woman’s perspective during the never-ending gender wars, they’re as narrow-minded as Meyer, and that’s what a feminism joke infers: Women’s opinions aren’t important. The bros that joke about feminists aren’t rabble-rousers “bruh,” they’re cloistered boys in a man’s body.
I don’t think feminism’s critical eye is unworthy even when it seeks out topics and tropes that have long since been overcome. Most people reading this live in a patriarchal society and if a woman sees sexism in something I can’t spot, I’m smarter for having heard that opinion, even when I don’t necessarily agree with it.
That’s not to say feminism hasn’t been wrong before, but it’s always worth noting what women think about a particular artist or piece of art. Oftentimes the feminism portrayed in movies or popular culture has become a buzz word for overreactions or overly emotive responses, but many times it’s more accurate than the mainstream, male-dominated opinions espoused.
I’m thinking of Tyler the Creator, and Maura’s exegesis of his song: “Suck Dick Bitches,” when I think of critical analysis that some would label feminist, as a dismissal, without realizing the hard truths are correct.
Maybe I’m lucky to have a twin sister and feminist for a mom, and if I didn’t, I never would have learned—and I did have to learn—why discounting feminist opinions was to my own detriment as much as it was to the writer or thinker I was ignoring. But whenever someone calls a woman a femiNazi or Bull Dyke or any other slang bros ham up to make other bros giggle, they’re seeking to discredit a woman’s perspective simply because she’s an outspoken woman offering her own opinion. I wince at what I used to laugh about.
Denigrating someone for being a “feminist” is not helpful, even if it’s true, and if it is true, we’re using the word wrong. As my sister told me once, “I love when people call me a feminist because I’d probably describe myself as a feminist.”
I was at a holiday party a good friend threw a couple weeks ago (Dodai throws an awesome party), and during the course of a conversation, I told a couple people my mom used to correct my friends when they called her Mrs. L__d. She kept her maiden name and so she wanted to be addressed by that name. My friends at the time initially thought my parents were divorced.
I laughed to the people at the party about how young and foolish we all were, and how women are keeping their maiden names all the time now. A guy corrected me and said, “no, they hyphenate now—your mom is still ahead of the times,” and we argued for a while because I thought it was more common these days. Then, a married couple I had talked to earlier at the party came over, and the women told me she kept her maiden name, and didn’t think it was so strange either.
I didn’t call her a feminist, but she is, and that’s a good thing.
-
buryyourselfinwords liked this
-
spencerlund posted this
